Monday, June 21, 2010

Whale Meat Again (with apologies to Vera Lynn)

I cannot believe that today in Morocco the IWC (International Whaling Commission) is meeting to discuss the possible renewal of commercial whaling!

Wake up, people, it's the 21st Century, 2010 to be exact! We shouldn't even be having this discussion any longer. I think our scientific knowledge has reached a point where we know that whales have the largest brain of all mammals, that they have complex social systems, that they communicate with one another over vast distances through the use of whale songs, that said songs have an immense vocabulary and that, generally, whales are highly sentient beings whom we should be doing everything we can to preserve.

Will we be like the stupid humans in Douglas Adam's book and watch as the last whales head off for a much friendlier planet with the farewell ringing in our ears: "So long and thanks for all the fish."?

I always imagine the whales must be swimming around the oceans thinking: "What did we do to these humans to piss them off so much?" Because you wouldn't normally hunt someone down over a vast area and fire explosive harpoons into them unless they'd really ticked you off!

The Japanese can't even sell the whale meat. They just seem to have this blind agenda as if the whales had personally insulted them. "Hey, Japan, Emperor Hirohito was a big girl's blouse!" "Hey, Norway, your breath smells like rotten cod!"

It just doesn't make sense, people, and it has to stop. It's bloody and it's bloody-minded and only Inuits have any legitimate claim to having whale meat on the menu. Japan, Norway, you don't need whale meat, you've both got McDonalds.

So I hope Dame Vera Lynn doesn't have to sing:

"Whale meat again, I know where and I know when,
but I know Japan and Norway want whale meat again
some shameful day."

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