"Untitled" by Michael Leunig

The smear on the footpath
The blot on the floor
The stain on the table
The scratch on the door
The smudge on the ceiling
The splotch on the chair:
The marks that remind me
My true love was there.

by Michael Leunig

"Stan the Fan" by Michael Leunig

I'm a huge fan of the fan
And when I'm feeling hot
I have a fan called Stan
I turn him on a lot.

I lie there on the bed
Stan sits upon a stool
He slowly turns his head
And everything is cool.

I love to sleep with Stan
And feel him by my side
Stan's the lovely man
Who keeps me satisfied.

by Michael Leunig

"Untitled" by Michael Leunig

Life is but a leap into a bucket;
Seize a juicy saveloy and suck it;
Tell your enemies to go and shove it;
Plunge into your life and try to love it.

by Michael Leunig

"Where the Hoon Sucks (apologies to William Shakespeare)" by Michael Leunig

Where the hoon sucks, there suck I;
In an Irish pub I lie;
There I couch as bowels do cry.
Off the handle I do fly
In the summer hot and dry.
Merry, merry I shall be;
Head butt if you look at me.

by Michael Leunig

"Lament" by Michael Leunig

As I lay sleeping
The graffiti boy came creeping;
Creeping through the dark
To make a boring mark
That made no sense
Upon the paling fence.

I can recall
When old Jack Frost would call
As I lay curled;
He painted half the world
In sparkling white;
And always got it right.

by Michael Leunig

"Untitled" by Michael Leunig

I had a strange and happy thought;
It was my own;
But oh, its time was all too short
And it has flown.

Into a world that's all at sea;
No place to land,
Happy thought come back to me
And hold my hand.

by Michael Leunig

"Danger" by Michael Leunig

If the sky should fall upon my head

If I'm struck by lightning

If a meteor lands upon my bed

Is it frightening?

OR is it nice?

And somewhat to the point and fair enough

Plain and simple, clear and...precise!

And do I give a stuff?

by Michael Leunig

"Of All the Loves" by Michael Leunig

Of all the loves that can be known
One has remained
Nameless;
It's the
Love of microphone
and it's the most
Shameless!

"Untitled" by Michael Leunig

Do not mock the little rock,
After you are dead and gone
The rock remains to carry on;
Steady, true and still;
Sitting in the sunshine on the hill.

"Untitled" by Michael Leunig

I went to Mars on a rocket ship
To look for signs of life.
I found a woman there.
She became my wife.
We had some little babies.
They were so unique;
Neither Earthling nor Martian
Did they speak.
Yet they sang, they played,
They GLEAMED.
We slept peacefully together.
We dreamed
Of a planet up above
Where there is new life
And there is love.